“Hoo…..” my girlfriend sighed, fanning herself in an animated fashion while the rest of my lunch companions laughed empathetically at her playful exasperation. The male equivalent of Halle’ Berry, President Number 44 had just wrapped another eloquent and profound speech. We of course, eschewed the ratings of opinion polls because as far as we were concerned even one year after the inauguration, we couldn’t have made a more sound decision with our votes. As intelligent educated females we had viewed our candidate as the ideal person to fill the highest political office in America. As women, our imaginations had viewed him as the ideal man….in every way. For those of us who go through life trying to piece together a man with such endearing qualities as those publicly and privately displayed by our leader, it is all at once inspiring to know that they do exist but disheartening to realize we just don’t know where to look. What did Michelle do to have garnered such a wonderful blessing? Furthermore, how can the rest of us be expected to remain sensible about a man whose testosterone we can smell right through the television? My girlfriend’s “Hoo” was quite understandable, but in a jungle where Tiger’s can become Cheetahs overnight we must be mindful not to become poachers. Maybe her wistful sigh should be coined the acronym of restraint for “Hands Off Obama!”
During the presidential campaign many of us had secretly crossed fingers that no untoward woman would suddenly emerge from some dark sideline to discredit his immaculacy. For the most part he appears and we believe he is far too honorable to commit any act that would demean himself, his beautiful family, or the United States, but eight years is a long time. Too often the people we subconsciously put on pedestals betray our trust and it diminishes our spirit, from Priests and Presidents to Tigers and every level between. In Washington there have been many examples of this type of elevation and disappointment. Clinton/ Lewinski is still one of the most popular, yet her story is just one of many young interns. Often powerful officials will target the new girls (or guys) but this also frequently works in reverse with some new comers believing a sexual collaboration will catapult their career. Or, in some instances general admiration for a powerful man slips into an unexpected crush, and crushes as we know move in and renovate without invitation, occupying most of the brain and leaving only a tiny room available for clarity where the curtains are closed most days…. except, maybe Tuesdays.
It was this type of cloudy crush that confused another friend of mine who was living in Atlanta some years ago. She began parking her car outside Evander Holyfied’s home after she decided; she was going to marry him, no matter what! After several days of getting dressed to the nines only to end up sitting in her car for hours she finally gave up on the idea to scale his security fence. Then after a few more months she gave up on him. More recently another friend felt she had been given divine information that she was supposed to be the wife of a famous and prominent pastor who just happened to already be married. She was certain that if she could just get him to notice her that he would leave his wife. She sent numerous cards and letters to his office head quarters that went without response. This prompted her to begin following him to speaking engagements across the country. She continued in this vein for over a year, securing front row seats at each venue until she was finally distracted by the male confidant she had used as a sounding board and ended up marrying him. I found this particular situation interesting because she herself was a pastor and well versed in scripture, yet she had become a poacher, pursuing her prey selfishly without regard for God, or the prey’s marriage vows. Suddenly a smart, wonderful, compassionate woman was being lead by a baser nature that was completely apathetic to the facts that she would hurt his wife, her sister in God, or that his children would be devastated, or that his position as a leader and role model for his followers could be destroyed.
Most of us are able to maintain our infatuations within the good sense boundaries of old fashioned admiration, but for others infatuation literally morphs itself into the confusion of an obsessive fixation and bends us to its’ will. Together, in good fun, my friends and I say our “Female Only” things about President Obama and believe we have good sense, but I have no doubt that any of us, single, married or barely breathing wouldn’t swoon if we imagined he glanced at us the right way, hence the concern. And, what about those women who have close access to him day after day? Exactly how does one exempt herself from the poaching impulse when presented with such a magnificent creature? How is it possible to survive the bedazzling Alpha Male testosterone tsunami whenever 44 enters a room? …Prayer? Prayer!
There are those private rules and boundaries that we impose upon ourselves whether it be from a religious perspective or a simple understanding of right and wrong. Once we have decided our personal values most of us fight to create and maintain our private integrity, yet if we are honest most of us can agree that it is hardly ever easy. Morals are encouraged to fade more each day. We find ourselves captivated and thrilled by Jerry and Maury and overwhelmed by reality TV shows that exploit and glorify human dysfunction. Some of us have become slaves to a mouse who promises to deliver every type of sexual depravity so we sit there and pet him for hours. Meanwhile the morality of the world is being held together by an invisible, visible web whose obscure lines are stretched so thin that it is selfishly crossed time and time again without any consideration for morality and the laws of the jungle become perplexing and obsolete. Hunters, prey, victims, poachers all assuming the other’s role. It’s hard to know where danger waits.
Today as I petted my own mouse I was horribly dismayed to happen upon a cleverly disguised site intended specifically for the President. My stomach rigorously threatened to return the lunch I was enjoying as soon as the page opened. Hundreds of nude women of every race age and figure were displayed in the most explicitly lewd photographs imaginable complete with full contact information and what they would do to and for him. This was just one incident and one site but with this many poachers waiting for the dawn how can any type of animal survive? Sadly, females have been given a bad reputation since “Eve,” and it’s true that many apples have been bitten without our encouragement, but it can’t be denied that we are perpetuating our own myth with this behavior. I’m certain that this will not be the only site or the only way an attempt to distract and dishonor him will be made so to all my sisters I say, please, for the good of a Nation let’s try and make it through these eight years! Don’t go to DC when the hormones kick in if you don’t have to! When he gives a speech and the scent of MAN wafts from the set just fan it away and say “Hoo!,” because in a world that is becoming so overwhelmingly gray the only thing that seems to be in plain Black and White is our President! Let’s keep it that way.